Buffet ideas and details
Plan the "flow" of a buffet table to prevent log-jams and plate-juggling. Plates first, main course, sides, bread, condiments, silverware last, etc. I also find it helps keep people moving if I set a separate beverage and/or condiment area near the tables and ensure that any carved food is carved to the point of providing about 4 oz per person. Remember to separate light and dark turkey so folks can quickly get what they want without mauling the bird. If the group is large and I serve an expensive item like shrimp, I enlist one of the older kids or close friend to "serve" one or two to each person, on request, at the table.
Further "layout" tips: If you have small children or physically-challenged guests, avoid chafing dishes and candles; ensure any table cloth is not easily moved; your dishes are not your finest (or put out some of the less-breakable ones)and make sure that everyone knows where to eat and what to do with their empty plates.
Place any dish that is slippery or requires manipulation to get a serving (whole fish, casserole,Jell-O, etc.) toward the front edge, not in the back. Defintely do not put out dessert at the same time as the main course - the people who want sweets will destroy the desserts before the rest have a chance to admire your pie - or even get a slice!
Parents: you are responsible for your child and their eating habits. If the kid will only eat macaroni and cheese, you best feed them before you come as you cannot expect the hostess to make a special meal for one child. If they have a severe allergy, please tell the host in advance. No one wants to make a mad dash for the Epi-pen!
Hosts: Plan for a vegetarian dish (not vegan, just vegetable). People with really strict diets will eat in advance or what they can on the buffet and will, politely, not make a big deal out it.
Alcohol is tricky in groups and can be expensive. Pre-dinner drinks must be accompanied by what my great-aunts used to call "blotting paper" - hand food or snacks to absorb the alcohol. If I don't know the members of the group well, I will request a pre-dinner beverage order, rather than an open bar, or offer a non-alcoholic punch before dinner. If you choose to offer an open bar before the meal, limit the amount of time it is available to no more than 1 hour before food service. Then the hard liquor bar is closed during the meal. If you choose to have beer or wine during the meal, it should be served, not just plunked on the table. Water and soft drinks or punch should outnumber anything with alcohol. Avoid orange soda, cherry juice or other staining drinks with small kids. And there is no requirement to provide any alcohol!
If you get no requests to help clean-up, ask for help. Almost every age can patrol the house for dirty dishes and glasses, scrape plates (without silverware on them) into the garbage, take out the garbage, entertain the little kids for a few minutes, help bring in dishes from the buffet, sweep the dining room, etc.
I hope that you will remember to record the occasion in some way, preferably with sound. Families really open up in these situations and the stories will be your memories for years to come.
Buffet ideas and details
Plan the "flow" of a buffet table to prevent log-jams and plate-juggling. Plates first, main course, sides, bread, condiments, silverware last, etc. I also find it helps keep people moving if I set a separate beverage and/or condiment area near the tables and ensure that any carved food is carved to the point of providing about 4 oz per person. Remember to separate light and dark turkey so folks can quickly get what they want without mauling the bird. If the group is large and I serve an expensive item like shrimp, I enlist one of the older kids or close friend to "serve" one or two to each person, on request, at the table.
Further "layout" tips: If you have small children or physically-challenged guests, avoid chafing dishes and candles; ensure any table cloth is not easily moved; your dishes are not your finest (or put out some of the less-breakable ones)and make sure that everyone knows where to eat and what to do with their empty plates.
Place any dish that is slippery or requires manipulation to get a serving (whole fish, casserole,Jell-O, etc.) toward the front edge, not in the back. Defintely do not put out dessert at the same time as the main course - the people who want sweets will destroy the desserts before the rest have a chance to admire your pie - or even get a slice!
Parents: you are responsible for your child and their eating habits. If the kid will only eat macaroni and cheese, you best feed them before you come as you cannot expect the hostess to make a special meal for one child. If they have a severe allergy, please tell the host in advance. No one wants to make a mad dash for the Epi-pen!
Hosts: Plan for a vegetarian dish (not vegan, just vegetable). People with really strict diets will eat in advance or what they can on the buffet and will, politely, not make a big deal out it.
Alcohol is tricky in groups and can be expensive. Pre-dinner drinks must be accompanied by what my great-aunts used to call "blotting paper" - hand food or snacks to absorb the alcohol. If I don't know the members of the group well, I will request a pre-dinner beverage order, rather than an open bar, or offer a non-alcoholic punch before dinner. If you choose to offer an open bar before the meal, limit the amount of time it is available to no more than 1 hour before food service. Then the hard liquor bar is closed during the meal. If you choose to have beer or wine during the meal, it should be served, not just plunked on the table. Water and soft drinks or punch should outnumber anything with alcohol. Avoid orange soda, cherry juice or other staining drinks with small kids. And there is no requirement to provide any alcohol!
If you get no requests to help clean-up, ask for help. Almost every age can patrol the house for dirty dishes and glasses, scrape plates (without silverware on them) into the garbage, take out the garbage, entertain the little kids for a few minutes, help bring in dishes from the buffet, sweep the dining room, etc.
I hope that you will remember to record the occasion in some way, preferably with sound. Families really open up in these situations and the stories will be your memories for years to come.